Henry John Ronald Relf was born at Chadwell St. Mary, near Tilbury, Essex on 27 Apr 1920, the only child of Henry Relf and Ethel May Elizabeth nee Newman. Presumably to differentiate between he and his father, he was always known as "Sonny" within the family until well into manhood when he seems to have dropped the nickname in favour of Harry - or just plain Henry. When his father got a job as butler to Chichester Cathedral's organist, the family moved into the Cloisters where he spent most of his boyhood. He boarded at the Bluecoat School, opposite the Cathedral, where he described the conditions as rugged; basic food, little heating and strict discipline. After leaving school, in 1934, he went into the Hotel trade with the intention of setting up a small hotel eventually in conjunction with his parents after he had learned the trade. Unfortunately, the Second World War intervened and he was never to realize his ambition. But, it was during this time that he found his true loves – photography (including movies) and Vera.

Henry first met Vera Nellie Curtis while she was cleaning the silverware in the courtyard and he was working as a Page Boy at the Pullin Rock Gardens Hotel in Bognor Regis. They were married just four months later, on Boxing Day 1939, at Littlehampton, and, after a short honeymoon in London, moved to Vera's home town, Northampton, where Henry got a job in Rice's foundry - his employment for the rest of his working life.

After living in rooms in Ruskin Road and Victoria road, with the Beverly Sisters as neighbours and baby-sitters, they eventually moved to a new estate. As well as bringing up their two children, Henry was one of the founders of the Gloucester Social Club, named after the road they lived in – Gloucester Crescent, which organised outings, parties, sports days & many other social events; Vera served on the Ladies Committee. In 1956 they moved to Derby Road, where they lived until their deaths. They both enjoyed travel, roaming Britain by bus or train, walking and hiking; neither of them ever learned to drive a motor vehicle. Often they took their grandchildren on holiday with them.

After Henry retired in 1982, they visited Vera's cousins in North America, touring much of the Pacific coast, from Alberta to California, by Greyhound bus. This was one of the highlights of their lives, and they made a return trip a few years later. Both Henry and Vera had a strong interest in genealogy and generously made their knowledge available to me when I took up the hobby. When we founded the International Relf Society in 1990, Henry was an enthusiastic supporter and proudly became Member number 15. Henry also had an invaluable photographic record of the family stretching back over 70 years.

In recent years their health began to fail. Vera had a fall in September 2002 from which she never recovered passing away on the 10 Nov 2002. A short time after this Henry collapsed and was taken to the same hospital where he also died. Those who knew them best are in no doubt that Henry died of a broken heart; Vera had been the centre of his life for around 64 years.

They will be fondly remembered not only by their children, Ron & Sheila, 4 grandchildren, and 7 great-grandchildren, but also by many of us who count ourselves very fortunate to have known these two wonderful people.

Brian R F Relf
Member No. 1
President of The International Relf Society

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Page last revised 24th April 2003.